Embarrassing...

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  • RumperChunk

    My buddy just bought me a beer, and then told a funny story about his girl, I laughed so hard the beer came out of my nose and all over a womans shirt. The shirt was white, and I had a nose bleed at the same time... I just sprayed her. Total money shot. Now I can never show my face again. Make me feel better... Tell me stories of shame...

  • pinkfloyd0

    hahaha

  • kgvs720

    I thought this girl had coal smear on her arm, I went to swipe it and it didn't go away. It was a birthmark.

  • maquito0

    • I love this picpinkfloyd
    • totallyDodecahedron
    • I think this might very well be the first photo I ever downloaded or saw on the web. It's been around since at least 98mg33
    • 1998mg33
  • akrok0

    there's an easier way to get a girl attention.

  • Dodecahedron0


    *directed at the woman

  • bjladams0

    a girl at a coffee shop i frequent always stops to chat. i always just smile and nod. the other day i let her in of the fact that i'm deaf. there was awkward silence after that... well, for me anyway.

    • lol. wait.

      lol.
      bigtrick
    • did you ever understand what she was saying to you?scarabin
    • something blablabla, something else blabla - actually, yes. i'm getting pretty good at lip reading.bjladams
    • i've actually spent hours with people before i let on sometimes - can converse quite well really.bjladams
  • sheen0

    oh please. i expected so much more.

  • VikingKingEleven0

    My friend and I met these two chics at the bar to take home, they had a mitsubishi eclipse. I got a ride with the two girls while my friend took off in another car. Well needless to say I was drunk. I yacked into bucket seats in the back completely filling them up. I threw up all over myself and the back of the car. As they freaked out I stripped all my clothes off, threw $30 at the girls and said get your shit clean. I did not get laid that night.

    • Our copywriter puked in the back seat of my car at my first agency.pinkfloyd
    • I don't understand why you didn't get laid. You did everything right.monospaced
    • He payed for the cleaning of coursepinkfloyd
    • fail. :) glorious failduhsign
    • ahahahahabigtrick
    • hahahaakrok
    • And my clothes were all strung across the parking lot. I only had my boxersVikingKingEleven
    • is KFC still open?monospaced
    • Oh this is made my Friday, great stuff! I only wish i could of seen the girls faces!CodenameAM
  • pinkfloyd0

    It could have been worse RumperChunk, at least you didn't puke on her.

  • mg330

    One time in high school I went to a college graduation party with my best friend; the party was for a friend of my sister's, they were all about 10+ years older than us. We were 17. I didn't really like beer much and spent the whole evening drinking straight margarita mix - no ice, no crushed ice, just margarita mix and tequila.

    At one point I realized that I was feeling awful and wanted to go to the bathroom. Thought I was probably going to be sick. Bathroom was occupied so I went in their guest room and locked the door. I ended up sitting on the edge of the bed, and then projectile vomiting ALL OVER THE FUCKING WALL AND CARPET. Just gallons of vomit. I got super nervous and something made me think that the best way to clean up was to take off my shirt, take off my white undershirt, and somehow, drunkenly, clean up the puke. Not sure how well I did because i was hammered out of my mind, but for some reason I took my puke soaked undershirt and stuffed it in a cowboy boot in the closet...

    Later that night my sister's boyfriend was asking me if I got sick, and I kept denying it, but they knew it was me.

    Fast forward a few months and the homeowners started to notice a really nasty smell in that bedroom. Turns out I had also puked into an air conditioner vent and it was all caked in there and smelling when they turned the air on.

    At some point after that I ran into those people at an REM concert in Dallas, in 1996. My sister had passed away that summer and it was my first time to see those people since her funeral (not trying to bring down the awesomeness of this story, just adding for context.) Anyhow, they said I should come by for dinner sometime but at the very end threw in a "Just don't get sick in our house again," and kind of patted me on the back. I was busted. Never heard about the fate of my puke soaked shirt in their cowboy boot.

    Wait, that's not embarrassing, it's fucking awesome. WINNING.

    • who graduates college at 27?monospaced
    • Lolkgvs72
    • People getting PhDs. I don't know, they had some younger friends, could have been for one of them.mg33
    • Lovely story.
      The cowboy boot detail, exquisit.
      maquito
    • hahahahahabigtrick
    • (and sorry to hear about your sister ): )bigtrick
    • lolJaline
  • maquito0

    • love the choir director still moving arms to the sound of music at the end.maquito
    • bhahahahahahahahaMiguex
    • I love how he grins big as fuck, as the vomit loads up in his mouth, until the breaking point.mg33
    • girl got taggedmoldero
  • DRIFTMONKEY0

    New Year's Eve some years back. I was with friends in Buffalo. I wasn't all that drunk but I was feeling confident that night. Good vibe in the club, although I didn't go to a lot of clubs back then. I see a girl on the dance floor, and notice she's alone so I begin to my plot to move in. I get on the dance floor, and I'm making my way towards her. I decide once the next song starts, I'm going to make my move in. Well, the next song started up and I get her attention and smile at her. She gives me a half smile, but its enough that I pursue further. So I am trying to get closer and she's not running away, so I keep getting closer. Now she starts making faces at me like she is embarrassed, so I chalk it up as her being shy, and keep pursuing. Then I notice she glances over at a table full of girls and shrugs likes shes confused. I notice the table of girls, and they are all face palming. Then I look around at some of the other tables and it appears people are, in fact staring at me. I look over at my friends and they are all laughing and pointing at me. That's when it hit me. I look around the dance floor and everyone is dancing the same way. Yup, turns out I was trying to grind on a girl in the middle of a line dance. Once this discovery hit me, I knew I had to take the walk of shame over to my friends, as pretty much every single person on the dance floor was annoyed with me. I had no idea what a line dance was, or ever seen one. Now I every time I hear the "electric slide" I piss my pants and forget who I am for about half an hour or so.

  • scarabin0

    once in high school i walked this girl i liked home, waited in her living room while she went to the restroom or took care of something else. i thought she had a really smelly house until i realized i had tracked dog shit in on my shoe... i wiped it off under a rug. when she came back i made up some excuse and bolted. SOMEBODY must have noticed sooner or later and i wonder to this day if she ever put 2 and 2 together

  • MrNibs0

    Was watching my buddy do this magic/comedy act on Cinco De Mayo and was standing at the back of a packed little room drinking a Dos Equis. At one point in the act I laughed so hard I shot beer from the back of the room all over the heads of the audience essentially drenching the back 3 rows.

    I feel your pain/shame.

  • CALLES0

    FUCK THAT!!! WE DONT KNOW YOUR BUDDY OR HES GIRLFRIEND! WHAT WAS SO FUNNY THAT MADE YOU DO THAT!

    yes cap intended

  • RumperChunk0

    This reminds me... Years ago before I got married, and was busy 'on the scene' I hooked up with a girl I met in a club.. Things got cozy so we went back to mine, and did what you need to do. Except a couple of hours in, she started having a fit which properly freaked me out. So I call the medics... They turn up and tell me all's ok, but I insist on them taking her to hospital, which they do. After waiting hours she decides she's ok and basically runs off with me chasing behind her. We go back to mine, at which point it's like 6 am and I have to get ready for work... So I say to her 'make yourself at home, and lock the door behind you when you're ready to go' thinking all will be well. I go to work, day is long and I'm shot. I head off home about 6pm and turn up to discover this girl has actually moved all her shit into my apartment and has cooked me dinner. I have never been so freaked in my life. I called my brother up, and we had to remove her from the apartment with her threatening to stab herself. We ended up calling the police and having her admitted to the hospital... After that I used to see her at the cinema, at my local bar... For about a year or so. She even wrote me hate mail saying she had had an abortion and that she was going to abort me aswell... Fucking nuts. I went traveling to south America for a year purely because of her... And then moved to London...

  • Ramanisky20

    we came back to work from lunch .. we had tacos and burritos.
    something didn't sit right with me and I went to the lake to drop my kids off. So I finish dropping my huge kids off and get up to flush and low and behold the flusher is not working. No water is going through. So now there's all this stuff in the bowl.
    So I open the door and step out to grab our secretary Diane and I say hey whats up with the flusher and she says "didn't you get the email I sent out the office? I say what email?...they are doing some kind of repair work next door and had to shut the water off. for 30-45 minutes ... FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU. She went inside real fast and I tried to stop her but .. shes like DAAAAAAMN .. which of course was loud and 2 other people came by and saw the path destruction that I had created. She made an Out of Service sign and put on the door.

    • ahahahahahaahaha!! why the hell would she *go in to check the bathroom* though? bad move on her partbigtrick
    • that's like saying..... "ARGH - This totally reeks, you gotta take a whiff of this!"bulletfactory
    • yup, she was always like that trying to solve problems in the office, greatest secretary ever, except for that one timeRamanisky2
  • Ramanisky20

    so me and my buddies drive down to Mississippi's Casino's when the poker boom happened .. all the way down we are talking strategy and what to do in case of scenerio's .. poker talk ... I talk all types of shit. all confident like I was going to make the final table ... and I was the first one out of the tournament. :(

  • brandelec0

    years ago i went to a club with my buddy and both ended up with a couple of phone numbers. at midnight we decided to head back to his place to meet up with friends and spend an hour getting shitfaced. we get into competitions a lot so we started talking shit about how ugly the other person's girl is of whom we got phone #. so i got the brilliant idea to call my girl up and ask her to come over to friend's house. wow she actually shows up. so at this point it's just me, her, and him as everyone else either left or passed out around the house. we're all sitting at the couch chit chatting about how i wanted to go to a strip club earlier and she says ooooh well i'll give you a dance. next thing you know she's on top of me with nothing on but her skirt, socks, and shoes. i look over at my buddy, who is wide-eyed and jaw-dropped, and signal him to get the fuck out of here perv. he gets up and walks away and we both notice he's got a boner and we all laugh. a couple of songs later she turns around and rides my lap and goes "what. the. fuck."

    i lean to the side to get a view of the hallway and i see my buddy's head sticking out of a doorway just going to town on choking his chicken. she freezes. i'm speechless. he's looking at us and before he can say anything he blows his chunk all over the place. daft eh

    • This friend is really you, isnt it.Tausk
    • hahascarabin
    • i was so drunk but i remember so many things about that night so clearlybrandelec
    • why didn't you invite him? she seemed game?capn_ron
    • capn, i did invite him, i waved him in. but then she says "um. your friend is too close"brandelec
    • ohhh man. mood ruined.bigtrick
    • dang, you are a good man.capn_ron
  • mg330

    Damn, so much awesome puking on YouTube!


    • awesome slo-mo sound artefacts.
      That's how it really sounded to that kid. That moment lasted a lifetime.
      mikotondria3
    • LOL!mg33