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Transform > Warp
someone bump that thread about opening jpegs in textedit and deleting crap to get that weird effect
has to be a plugin for this somewhere...google it
Distort/ wave. thats what I would try.
pulling the sheet while scanning it will give you a similar effect.
what are you using it for?
Spray water on your monitor then drag your finger across it.
After effects had some in built, try searching static, grain etc in the effects palette. Throw in some slight offset and b&w and your nearly there.
I'm more looking for the scrambled eggs effect.