texts from last night
- Started
- Last post
- 22 Responses
- plash
http://www.textsfromlastnight.co…
isnt this like twitter?
- CALLES0
its going to sting a little
- zerocool0
(815): Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
(630): It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.Labels: (630), (815)
bubble Replies (0)HAHAHA
- JackRyan0
zerocool...whats acid_burn been up to lately?
- sublocked0
best site i've seen this week.
(818): On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
- bump790
This is the best:
Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
- grunttt0
(480): I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
- CALLES0
(323): WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Labels: (323)
- CALLES0
(678): did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
(404): did it work?
(678): nope
Labels: (404), (678)
Replies (18)
- landock0
(678): did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
(404): did it work?
(678): nope
- CALLES0
(734): Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Labels: (734)
Replies (16)
- CALLES0
(775): Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
(1-775): What!?!?! How are you txting?!
(775): Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
Labels: (775)
Replies (35)
- CALLES0
917): last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
(917): this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
(917): he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
(718): messed up. what color are the wings?
Labels: (718), (917)
- CALLES0
(727): im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
(303): lol who won
(727): well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Labels: (303), (727)
Replies (6)
- kafkaesque0
(415): Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Labels: (415)
- bump790
(281) wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
- i didn't get that one.refunktion
- maybe she plans on giving him hickeysscarabin
- bump790
(704): I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
- brothernoah0
(859): im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
- landock0
(856): My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
- digdre0
Today, I ran into my serious boyfriend of two years at a restaurant. He was sitting with another girl. I went over and asked him who she was. He replied, "Who are you?" Apparently I was the secret girlfriend.
- blaw0
(123): Wasn't this posted posted earlier in the week?
(456): Maybe. I didn't bother with the 'filter'.