The Parlor
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- 7point340
so who's penning the script to this delightful romp?
i'm thinking the writers from friends or 2 and a half men
- dropdown0
As if we could afford such luxuries. Nope, I'm afraid we're stuck with one of the writers from Survivor, and the bagel gopher from The OC.
- locustsloth0
Good news, though. i'll take care of all transitions and titles
- dropdown0
Perfect. I'll be in charge of making the females on set uncomfortable and harassed.
- 7point340
i'll be the drunk, strung out lead that shows up late and hungover to all the scenes, wearing sunglasses, not knowing any of my lines. the one that curses at amateur stage hands and has a very public hooker problem.
but, i've got a heart of gold, i do!
- dropdown0
Ok, so all we need now is a love interest and a story line...
- locustsloth0
What we have so far:
7point34 stars as a Chocolate Hello Kitty who, while at the hospital for injuries he sustained while drunkenly swearing at a hooker, discovers he has a deadly and highly communicable virus. Jaline stars as CHK's estranged wife who gave up on him years ago but volunteers to violate the quarantine surrounding his hospital room, thus sacrificing herself, in order to kill CHK and save the world.i'll call Paramount
- Jaline's featured line in the trailer:
"It's not cannibalism if he's made of chocolate!!"locustsloth - HA i love it... but where do we fit in?dropdown
- yesjuhls
- Jaline's featured line in the trailer:
- canuck0
*Backs out of the thread very slowly.
- locustsloth0
dropdown can play the doctor who plans to siphon CHK's blood in order to hold the city for ransom, threatening to poison the water supply. But he can't do that until the virus has reached it's mature phase, right before it takes CHK's life. However, as we know, Jaline's character unknowingly foils Dr. Styles's plans when she kills CHK and herself.
i will play orderly #3
- with sexy results?dropdown
- we'll consider itlocustsloth
- Though with orderly #3, everything comes out sexylocustsloth
- dropdown0
"These pretzels are making me thirsty!"
- locustsloth0
canuck could be Jaline's character's current love interest (it's only a movie and a fake one at that). He's always been jealous of CHK and has to hold his rage in any time Jaline's character (let's call her Eliza) eats a hershey's bar. So when Eliza hears of CHK's affliction and decides to go to him, canuck's charcter (Percy) refuses to let her go alone. All through the movie he's trying to convince her to forget about it and go home. But at the end of the movie, when Eliza is deciding whether to kill CHK (and herself) or not, it's Percy who gives his blessing and turns Eliza's tables to be in favor of going thru with it.
- the more absurd this gets, the more i want to make it into an actual movielocustsloth
- locustsloth0
i think my genius may have chased everyone away
- your genius is showing7point34
- modesty is for commonerslocustsloth
- locustsloth0
Have a good vacation, Percy!!!
- Keep the place clean while I'm gone. And no burritos in the hot tub.canuck
- i can't make any promises for dropdown, but as for me, the tub will remain tex-mex freelocustsloth
- dropdown0
Have fun out West you WEC!
- 7point340
300?