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- Horp0
So it was like a plaster cast of his erection, and you handled it?
Oh man, your Mom is right to be concerned about you. = )
- its not like i was into it********
- was it into you?********
- Did you find yourself assessing its size in comparison to yourself though?Horp
- is this one of those Q&A sessions to walk me to the line? IM NOT GAY********
- Walk with me Drgss. Lets find the line.Horp
- but you did just briefly stroke it, didn't you? just briefly, unnoticed.. a wee tender stroke..janne76
- its not like i was into it
- Horp0
I once sat in a pub for an entire evening with an aggressively homophobic acquaintance who was constantly yammering on and on and on about hating 'the gays', and I was trying to find out why he had such a massive problem with it.
I hit on this idea of seeing how closeley I could walk him to the line through a Q&A session. It took hours, starting with "is it gay to look at another man?" and he'd be suspicious and refuse to answer without further definitions, so "You are dressed, he is dressed, you are both sat in a pub and you happen to look at each other.. are you gay"... it was great becuase he started off saying even things like that were gay 'unless the other bloke was asking him for matches to light a cigarette', so, okay, he's asking you for a light and you look at each other, is that gay?... no.
And we went on and on, carefully defining things. Touching a hand was gay, unless shaking hands, and then via shaking hands he got comfortable with a more general touching hands scenario and agreed it wasn't gay.
I got that bloke to such a mad, obviously homoerotic extreme scenario in the end. I forget what but I had massaged him enough through gradual increments to say he would be prepared to be naked in bed with his best friend spooning him while they held hands and kissed and it wouldn't be gay. It was fucking nuts.
Fucking idiot. He was so ashamed of admitting that when he'd sobered up that he never spoke to me again hahahaha
- Horp0
Okay, so... Drgss... you're sat in a bar, and you make eye contact with another male. Is that okay? or is that gay...
- You and your best friend are in bed, naked, spooning, holding hands and kissing. Is that gay?Horp
- Are scented candles burning and kenny g playing softly in the background?ian
- No. Gregorian Football chants and the smell of eggy farts.Horp
- Definitely not gay. Unless there's penetration, then all bets are off.ian
- ian0
That's fucking funny spooks!
I just watched gran Torino this evening. I really can't believe how shite it is. I've had an hour long conversation about how michael bay should direct the remake and the car be a transformer with more explosions and kurt Russell instead of clint Eastwood.
- Horp0
Clint Eastwood is apprasing a plaster cast of Kurt Russell's erection by tossing it lightly between his hands and tapping the tip against his lips whilst looking perplxed. Clint is wearing Daisy Dukes and is on his knees on the hood of a refurbed 1978 Pontiac Firebird.
Kurt is sat in the driver seat in black leather driver's gloves and Jackie O sunglasses. He appears to be wearing lipstick. Clint catches Kurt's salacious grin and winks back like a cowgirl.
Is that gay?
Did I just make that up?
Oh, ... shit.
- Are scented candles burning and kenny g playing softly in the background?ian
- chossy0
She also tried to eat some bees once but they stung her face and her face swole up and it looked cute but she could barely respire so we called the vet, he did nothing and she slept for about three days..... she seemed fine after that.
- This memory of her massive face has made me smile, (sorry pip)chossy
- chossy0
Come to think of it you could probably shoot my old dog in the face and she would sleep then wake up all healed a few days later :D, she died though unfortunatley she got to much anethetic when she was going in for an operation and she sleeped too deeply :'( fitting end I suppose for sleepy poochy :)
- She was a kind of Easter Jesus dog... if its not too blasphemous of me to say so.Horp
- actually I might go dig her up she may be in a massive sleep and not dead?....chossy
- actually no she died over a decade ago, she can't still be asleep......chossy
- No Chossy, no... she's gone mate. let her rest, you'll only get upset again.Horp
- I'll raise a glass to your pooch dear choss. A dog after me own heart, may she rest in peace.ian
- chossy0
I think Rands dog is called 'piper'
- chossy0
I just want an even six in a row that'll make me happy, nice even number :).
- Horp0
^ You got it Choster. I'm off to bed now you've done the double hatrick.
Awesome power dreams to all my friends. G'nigth
- Mau0
- mau, please see previous page. need some font help********
- pg 2350********
- mau, please see previous page. need some font help
- ian0
Mau, chossy, horp. Fuvkit, even morilla, awesome stuff. Massive hugs all round, u glorious bastards!
- Mau0
- Perfect, that's it! Thanks!!!!********
- I like shango as well.********
- Perfect, that's it! Thanks!!!!
- Autokern0
i forgot how funny quake was
- ********0
- ********0
- this is my halloween costume for this year. problem solved!_salisae_